Unit $our

I would say Jake uses the normative resource power base. Jake and I each have our areas that we are in charge of, and that gives us power over them. Jake and I are a traditional family where he is the main breadwinner and I stat at home with our son. That gives us both power in different ways. Even though Jake is the main income, he never treats it like it is his own. It is the families money to be used where necessary.

This is a very successful way to use power because I think it gives each person a sense of power in some area. It spreads the power out.

Our famili is conversational. We talk about everything, even if it may cause an argument. We think that it is important to be open and honest and talk about what is on your mind.

Even though Carter is only 2, we still include him in our conversations because that is one way that he learns to talk. We listen to what he has to say even if it doesn't make any sense to us!!

I think Jake and I have become more converstional over time. My family was conversational as well, but Jake's was not. He and his brother had no say in anything and were on the backburner most of the time. So it was harder for Jake to share his feelings and what he thought with me.

We are now conversational and we have some totally different opinions and views, but that is ok and we will teach our kids to also be open and conversational.

Being conversational is very successful in our family. Sometimes being open can cause arguments, but they are srguments that need to happen to get past our differences.

Parent Interview Project

Parent Interview Project
Below I have parents that I interviewed. I chose these particular parents because it gave me a wide range of age, gender and I even chose a colleague that had adopted her children to possibly get a different perspective, and I did!

Who I Interviewed

1. Jake Shull- 23 years old, Caucasian, Part of the Working Middle Class and has one son, Carter whom is two.

2. Penny Sholl- 54 years old, Caucasian, Part of the Middle Class, has three children ages 28, 25, and 22.

3. Carrie Cox- 36 years old, Caucasian, Part of the Middle Class to Lower Class, has three daughter ages 17, 13, and 11.

4. Donna Brown- 47 years old, Caucasian, Part of the Middle Class, has two adopted children ages 13 and 11.

Have Things Changed Over Time?
Even though I did interview parents of different age and with children at different ages, I came to the conclusion on all of their interviews that they don’t think that much has changed over time. The only interview that brought up something that changed was Carrie. She stated that she thought our culture and society has become more sexual and that the sex is acceptable to the public.

When I asked a question about if they think we are living in turbulent times, I had two that said no and two that said yes. One parent that said no gave the reasoning that every age or generation has problems and this one is no more turbulent that others. One parent that said yes supported her answer with the worry and scare that our country is moving away from good morals that should be taught to all humans; Family morals and even Biblical morals.

Different Definitions of Family
I thought everyone had the same definition of family. I was wrong!! Each person that I interviewed had different definitions, but I will only talk about two. Donna is the parent that adopted her children and gave me a more unique answer than the other three. To her, “Family is people who are committed to each other, to love and respect each other, who work together for a common goal and a common existence.” Donna said that had she not adopted her children, then her definition would have been more biological. She said her definition of family changed when she realized that families can be made in many different ways.

Penny had a different answer than Donna. She said that, “Family is a group of people that are related by blood or marriage.” This is a biological answer as opposed to Donna’s. Carrie made a unique comment when she said that people who can physically have children think of family, they think biological; but if you were unable to have children, and had to take another route, your definition of family changes, just as Donna’s did.

Effective Parenting
I chose to interview parents of different age so that I could get different points of view. When it came to an effective parent, they all said the exact thing first, and of course, they were all joking. I first interviewed Jake. When asked what makes an effective parent, the first thing that he said, “someone who beats their children.” Once again he was joking. But when I interviewed Penny, Carrie, and Donna, they all said the exact thing. Even though they all said it jokingly, I was amazed to see the connection. As they each went on they all also had similar answers to the question. So on this topic, I don’t think that much has changed over time. They all said that an effective parent is someone who: * Teaches their children to be responsible and productive
* Who listens without being overbearing or judgmental
* Who gives unconditional love and support
* Who sets guidelines that are consistent

Discussion in Families
Each parent that I interviewed said the same topics when I asked what they talk about as a family when they are all together with one exception. Some topics were:
· How everybody’s day was
· What they did that day
· Talking about work
· Venting about work
· How school was
· Issues in the world
The one difference in topics is that Penny said that they do not talk about politics much with each other because her and her husband are at different ends of the string. Which isn’t a bad thing, but usually it escalades into a heated discussion that isn’t pleasant to have. They both know that, so they limit their discussion on politics. On the other hand, Carrie has children that still live at home, and she and her husband make a point to talk about politics and things that are happening around the world. She says the main reason is so her children stay informed on what is going on.

Along with this question, I asked where the most communication took place in their family. Three of the parents that I interviewed said, “At the dinner table.” Their reason for this is that it is a set time that the whole family tries to get together each day to tell what they did and to just talk. Carrie, on the other hand, has a daughter that is a teenager that drives and that is involved in sports, so she said they communicate on the phone quite a bit whether it is calling or texting.

Parenting Stresses
Once again, all four of the patents that I interviewed had the majority of the same stresses as parents. The difference came with the age their children. For example, Penny’s children are all grown-up, but one of her biggest stresses was siblings arguing and dealing with teenagers. This was different for Jake because he only has a two year old.
Some of the stresses that all four parents said were:
Money: being able to pay the bills and support your family
Being a good parent while also working
When a child is hurt or sick
They all also said that they cope with it by talking it over with a spouse or friend and supporting each other emotionally when they are stressed.

Final Words
It was very interesting to me to do these interviews, and surprisingly enough, the parents said they enjoyed it because it made them really think. I also was surprised to see how similar the answers were across the board. I had thought that there would be more diversity it the answers, but I was obviously wrong. This interview also made me think more about what makes a family and in what ways I want to improve as a parent.